Oh, one of those

Every family has one (or sometimes more). You know, that person in your family you love and care for so much--yet you are disappointed and embarrassed by them all at the same time? We sure have one  in ours, and I'm sad to say this person is so unbelievably negative and selfish that I'm more and more at a loss with how to handle them in our life. These past few years, I've made a bit of a promise to myself to try to keep myself surrounded by positive people--people who genuinely have a kind heart. Some (usually those of the negative, selfish personalities) think of me as, and call me a snob for it. They like to tell others that I think I'm better than them. Well, I guess there's some truth to that. I am proud of myself that I don't act trashy and unkind to others. If it means I'm a snob, so be it.

I've been hurt, yet again, by "one of those". This time, though somewhat indirectly, my children were involved. Hence, the upset tummy feeling I've had in my stomach the past 2 days now. I know "these people" act this way to make up for their own insecurities and to get a rise out of the person they're directing their negativity to. And in our family's case, this person's ugly side comes out even more when drinking is involved. All reasons not to react the way my human nature initially wants me to.

Instead I will vent to my blog. Yesterday, waking up and seeing the trashy slander thrown my way, I focused on the fact that I was headed to my first bible study of the year that morning and could get that extra boost I needed to give it all to God. I often pray this person will want to better them self. I pray that  this person realizes the hurt and embarrassment their actions bring to family members. I'm realistic, though, and realize this person will never change, unfortunately. So I'm turning to God more than ever to at least see more clearly ways to protect my children--and other children in the family--from the hurt and negativity that is so selfishly (and drunkenly, too often) thrown out without ever thinking or caring about consequences or the hearts they affect.

Distance seems to help. And I hope that as time goes on these next couple days I will be at peace in m own heart and mind with the effects of this person's recent behavior. As always, I will continue to pray for them, because I care, can't help it---but more importantly, I will continue to pray even harder that my children never directly experience such hurtful behavior from this person in the years to come.